Being a single parent can either be by choice or by a split between you and your spouse. No matter the circumstance, your baby should never have to feel less than a child. This means your child still needs all the love and affection he or she can get from you. To be able to do this adequately, you have to learn to adjust to the change as well as to learn how to cope with whatever it is that is going on in your life. Remember, you are not only living a life for yourself but one for your baby too. Therefore, accepting your situation is always the best way to go. We will venture into some ways that can help you cope with being a single parent.
There are sadly some new moms who are not able to handle the thought of the big new role soon enough. This is called post-partum depression. In some cases, it pushes the new mom into severe depression, certain types of addiction, even to the brink of suicide. There are institutions that know this all too well and provide help with addiction consequential to post-partum depression.
To help the new moms adapt to their new role and not fall trap into post-partum depression, we have listed a few tips:
- Be adaptive to change
Sometimes, you don’t start out as a single mom. Sometimes, your spouse is around throughout the whole pregnancy and a few years of your child’s life, and then they disappear. In cases such as this, you need to be adaptive to change. Come to terms with your condition. The sooner you acknowledge the change in your life, the better you will be able to cope with being a single mom and the better life will be for you.
- Seek help
Don’t be afraid to seek help from family members and friends. You don’t have to do it all alone. Have you ever heard the saying, “It takes a village to raise a child?” That’s exactly how it can be in this situation. In terms of having significant others, being able to watch over your kid when you are not around or even just others to surround that child with love and undivided attention will be extremely helpful. Doing this, you will not feel burdened and may even feel that being a single mom is one of the best experiences you’ve ever had.
- Develop a routine
It would be best for single mothers to have specific routines to follow. Routines such as bringing and dropping off your kid to school and organizing daily activities to help alleviate stressful moments for the single mom. Remember, you don’t share these responsibilities with a partner, where when one parent falls short, the other can pick up. No! This time it’s only you, so you have to ensure that everything is in order.
- Be financially stable
If your spouse does not help out financially, you will have to ‘shoulder’ the burden of all expenses for your child. With this in mind, it is best to think wisely about your spending. Ensure that you have good insurance that covers both you and your child, good credit, and sufficient savings in your account for education and emergency purposes. This can be one of the hardest aspects of being a single parent, so it is best that you prepare well for it.
- Be open
Never be afraid to open up to your child. As they get older, the questions get more frequent, especially questions about their father. Respond to your child. Be truthful. This way, you and your child may have a bond and your child will be able to come to you with anything. Mind you, no child ever tells their parents everything. But, a wonderful bond assures you that your child will be able to confide to you openly about his or her life experiences. Doing this will help not only your child, but also you. Sometimes, when you are a single mom, you carry the guilt of not having to provide your child the gift of being raised by two parents. But, when you let them know simple things such as why, it makes things easier. It will be less difficult to cope if you and your child have an understanding of why things are the way they are.
- Disciplinary actions
Do not be one of the women who believe that discipline should only be done by your male counterpart. When your child knows what you stand for, you will be better able to keep them in line. Also, ensure that any other caregiver for your child upholds the boundaries you set for your child. Simple things such as discipline can help you cope as a single mom because it provides you with peace of mind, knowing that there are certain things that your child will not do.
Being a single mom is never an easy task. You may have to double up on your responsibilities. But as long as you follow these steps, you will be just fine. You can do it!